The following are [said to be] actual statements found in insurance forms
where car drivers attempted to summarize the details of an accident in
the fewest words. These instances of faulty writing served to
that even incompetent writing may be highly entertaining.
- Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a
tree I don't have.
- The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its
- I thought my window was down, but I found out it was up when
I put my head through it.
- I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.
- A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.
- A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
- The guy was all over the road, I had to swerve a number of
times before I hit him.
- I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-
in-law, and headed over the embankment.
- In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
- I had been shopping for plants all day, and was on my way
home. As I reached the intersection, a hedge sprang up
obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car.
- I had been driving for forty years, when I fell asleep at the
wheel and had an accident.
- I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble and my
universal joint gave way, causing me to have an accident.
- As I approached the intersection, a sign suddenly appeared in
a place where no sign had ever appeared before. I was unable
to stop in time to avoid the accident.
- To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the
- My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.
- An invisible car come out of nowhere, struck my car and
- I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my
hat, found that I had a fractured skull.
- I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other
side of the road when I struck him.
- The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran
- I saw a slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off
the hood of my car.
- An indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small
car with a big mouth.
- I was thrown from the car as it left the road. I was later
found in a ditch by some stray dogs.
- The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve
out of its way when it struck my front end.