English As She Is Spoke
English, like any language I guess, is replete with opportunities for ambiguity,
bloopers, and "foot-in-mouth" disease... Here are some examples of how
English has been used - and misused - in all seriousness, by people who
thankfully can remain anonymous... Enjoy them!
A list of Signposts from around the world.
A list of wonky Menu Items... yum yum - I think...
A list of Product Warning Labels that make you wonder what they were thinking of...
Some Questions by Lawyers taken from genuine
court records... the questions, that is, not the lawyers...
Some equally silly questions by Tourists in
some American national parks...
A list of bizarre Product Names... One for
the marketing boys, I think...
Some Newspaper Headlines that slipped past
the editors... The wonders of ambiguity!
Some Genuine Quotes from Accident Report Forms,
where people are trying to describe the details of an accident they have
been involved in.
How to apply for a job... Not! Some genuine quotes
found on people's Resumes and Cover Letters.
The things kids say - some answers on tests given
by grade school students.
World History - and an account of the history of the world, from some older students.
Young Proverbs - some grade school children were given
the first half of some common proverbs, and asked to fill in the other half. This page lists
their achievements. Ah, the wisdom of youth!
I take credit for none of these collections - the originators of most
are lost in the mists of time. All were received over the internet, but
I'm sure many of them pre-date that medium. Enjoy!