Michael Hartley's Humour Page

Check out the following:

• English As She Is Spoke but ought not to be! Funny distortions of the English language. Including :
  • A list of Signposts from around the world.
  • A list of wonky Menu Items... yum yum - I think...
  • A list of Product Warning Labels that make you wonder what they were thinking of...
  • Some Questions by Lawyers taken from genuine court records... the questions, that is, not the lawyers...
  • Not to leave out the medics, Quotes from Genuine Medical Records...
  • Some equally silly questions by Tourists in some American national parks...
  • A list of bizarre Product Names... One for the marketing boys, I think...
  • Some Newspaper Headlines that slipped past the editors... The wonders of ambiguity!
  • Some Genuine Quotes from Accident Report Forms, where people are trying to describe the details of an accident they have been involved in.
  • How to apply for a job... Not! Some genuine quotes found on people's Resumes and Cover Letters.
  • The things kids say - some answers on tests given by grade school students.
  • World History - and an account of the history of the world, from some older students.
  • Young Proverbs - some grade school children were given the first half of some common proverbs, and asked to fill in the other half. This page lists their achievements. Ah, the wisdom of youth!
• Some pictures of the Smart-est animalsin the animal kingdom!
• Some Soccer Football Quotes attributed to Bobby Robson. Enjoy!
• The Hunting Of The Snark and Jabberwocky: two nonsense poem by the author of "Alice In Wonderland"
• Sorry, the Maths Jokes Have been taken off-line. They were really pathetic. I'm sure that the overall quality of cyberspace has now improved because of this initiative. But would you like to visit my Maths Page?
• Noodles: These ancient poems are deeply significant. Read them out loud to your Malaysian friends.
• A guide to flying how to tell if you've done too much.
• A glossary of management terms.
• Collections of distorted Nursery Rhymes and Kid's Songs!
• Human Chronometric Modeling, an advanced image-processing technique to automatically generate your baby photo!
• See a joke maths article I wrote for a joke encyclopedia.